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Thursday, May 01, 2008

Scrapings from the Bottom of the Barrel

As often happens while I'm cleaning up the day's dishes, today while standing at the kitchen sink I had a bunch of phrases and blogworthyish thoughts pop into my head. What also often happens is that by the time I get back to my laptop I've forgotten said phrases or ideas. Today that's only half true. The thought I had while standing at the sink this evening was, "warm brownies with butter pecan ice cream on top is like a little piece of heaven right here on earth."

And then, right that minute (because I have no self-control) I served myself up a brownie (left-over from my visit w/ a friend on Sunday), heated it ever-so-slightly in the microwave and scooped the last bit of Haagen-Dasz Butter Pecan on top. And now I'm eating it and writing to you all about it and.. well... YUM.

pinky-brain.jpg
So I don't have a lot to say tonight; no words of fiscal wisdom, no schemes for World Domination a la Pinky & the Brain, not even much in the way of "life events." But there are a few things I've been meaning to share and a couple things that have sprung up this week that I thought I'd blog about for your entertainment. Or mine. I'm not sure.

Continue reading "Scrapings from the Bottom of the Barrel" »

Monday, March 10, 2008

Losing it. For Real

I don't think I've ever truly had a nervous breakdown. I mean, I've gotten really freaked out before, and a little bit nuts on occasion (okay, often) but completely losing my shit? Doesn't happen very often.

But, people, last week? Hands down, the single worst week of my professional life. (And I'm including in that the two-and-a-half week, cross-country press tour which culminated in my first - and so far only - bout with Optic Neuritis.) And it's not even one Big Huge Thing that happened last week to put me over the edge; rather, it was some toxic combination of too much work coupled with not enough people to do said work, topped by everything going wrong that could go wrong and sprinkled with a number of tiny little nitpicky things showing up over the course of the week adding up, all of which resulted in me working 45 hours over the course of 4 days (two of them being 13-hour days).

By the end of the day on Thursday I was near tears and, quite literally, could not string together a sentence more complex than, "I'm soooo tired," or "Umm... no." (And, strictly speaking, that last one isn't exactly a sentence...) And the saddest part was, I couldn't even take the entire weekend off: I ended up working about 6 hours yesterday as well, just to catch up on the things I should have done last week while I was busy fighting fires.

Continue reading "Losing it. For Real" »

Friday, February 29, 2008

almost paradise

almost_paradise.jpg As I mentioned on Monday, things with Mr. Norris have come to an end. It is unfortunate and there are things I regret about my own behavior and etc., but as I am not yet totally done processing this internally yet I'll leave off for the moment in providing more explanation. The best news I can offer at this point, about the parting of ways, is that I have more information about myself. That is, I know what I want and need a little bit better now, and I guess that's all you can hope for in this life.

So. Since I am not yet ready to say any more than that, I did want to share a bit of news with ya'll: my dad's latest album was released this month. It's called "Almost Paradise," and you can listen to some snippets of it at cdbaby.com and iTunes. (And for those of you in the Portland area, it is also available at Music Millennium.) The album features 15 songs written by his longtime friend Tim Otto.

I've written before about growing up listening to my dad's various musical collaborations and bands when I was a kid. Tim was a housemate of ours for part of that time, and in addition to serving as long-suffering babysitter on occasion and torturing me with his granola-hippy cooking, Tim also did a lot of song writing while he lived there. So in addition to knowing the words to (almost) every one of his songs from that era, there were also a number I heard in their very early stages but that were never performed or released anywhere.

Tim has an enormous catalog of music, most of which has never been heard before, so my dad hand-selected all 15 of the tunes you'll find on this new album. Several of those songs I'd heard before, but most of them are new to me as well. My favorites are, "Gunfighter Man," "The Road to Nowhere," "Still Can't Believe That You're Gone," "Old Memories" and "Hey Vaquero."

Give it a listen; I hope you hear something you enjoy. :)

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Go SOX! Yahoo!

Congrats to the 2007 World Champions, the Boston Red Sox!!! Wow, twice in the last five years. Of course, it's not quite as much fun as actually being in Boston, like I was last time they won, but it's still very, very cool.

It's been kind of a strange weekend. Much less busy, thankfully, than last weekend. Unfortunately, the lazier nature of this weekend had more to do with my nursing a migraine off and on throughout my two days off than it did with actual deliberate relaxation. Still, I managed to get some grocery shopping and laundry done, as well as go hear my friend Rob play cello with The Portland Cello Project.

Although it was a bit longer than I expected, the concert was really, really good. Who'd have thought 15 celli on stage at once would be so awesome!? They did a number of "alternative" pieces. For instance, they were joined on-stage by a hiphop group called HurtBird which - despite my general distaste for rap/hip-hop music - I really found interesting, along with arrangements of a Brandenberg Concerto (for 4 cellos and 2 more cellos), the jazz standard "Take Five" and a nifty tango by Astor Piazzola, complete with Argentine Tango dancers that reminded me that I need to get back to my second (or was it third?) love, partner-dancing.

Continue reading "Go SOX! Yahoo!" »

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Happy (?) Anniversary

I'm too tired to write much now, because I've just returned from the Oregon coast, where it was clear and sunny and beautiful but thankfully not too warm. In short, it was a perfect day to go to the ocean and I have many tales to regale you all with as well as pictures of everyone's favorite Yorkshire Terrier.

Here's a little teaser:
A girl and her dog

However, as today is the 1-year anniversary of my Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis, I felt I must mark it in some way. I have written at length about my own experience during my first year after being diagnosed with this disease so I'm not going to write any more about that lest I lose all my audience.

Instead, I want to point ya'll to this series of videos on YouTube about Jacqueline Du Pre, the fabulously gifted and famous British cellist who was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis at age 28 and died 14 years later in 1987 at the age of 42. I was reminded of this brilliant woman on Tuesday when I had dinner with my friend Rob (a cellist, naturally) and she's been on my mind.

This documentary/video is in about 8 parts on YouTube, but the first part is below, in the extended entry. The Elgar concerto is exquisite and despite the toll MS ultimately took on Du Pre, what she gave us with this concerto - and many other works - is nothing short of genius. In light of this, I continue to hope and pray for continued research leading to a cure.

Continue reading "Happy (?) Anniversary" »

Friday, May 25, 2007

It's happening again...

And by "It" I mean, "getting sucked into YouTube."

I ran across this post where Steve Goodman performs his "City of New Orleans" with Jethro Burns (of the famed "Homer & Jethro" duo) and after watching it I had to go find it and of course ran across a couple other gems, including a video of John Prine doing Souvenirs and a video of Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash singing "Jackson." And all this while I'm supposed to be doing my schoolwork that's due in, oh, 4 hours... (Oops!)

Anyway, I've mentioned my adoration of Steve Goodman here before. Clay Eals has recently released an 800-page biography of Steve Goodman and I can't wait to get my hands on it. There's a good review of the book here and as soon as I manage to read it I'll report back with my thoughts. (In the meantime, if anyone's wondering what I want for my birthday... well... hint hint. ;-)

Anyway, to save you the trouble of digging for that "City of New Orleans" video, here it is:

I think a lot of people may know this song from Arlo Guthrie's rendition of it, which initially made it famous. Johnny Cash called it the "best damn train song ever written" and there's a video on YouTube of him doing it too. (I wasn't kidding about getting sucked in. Seriously. It's like a maze in there!)

And for the dirty ole egg suckin' dogs out there who like Johnny Cash and The Muppet Show, here's a good one for a chuckle:

Continue reading "It's happening again..." »

Thursday, May 03, 2007

Some randomness to begin your weekend

Here are a couple random thoughts I've had over the last few days. There is a fairly remote chance that it'll spur conversation... Or cursing.

  1. Does anyone know how long a standard bar of soap lasts, when used on a nearly-daily basis? Surely it lasts less time than an 8 ounce tube-thingy of Bath & Body Works Gardenia-scented Creamy Body Wash? I discovered this stuff a couple years ago, while I was still in Boston, and I don't think I've used actual soap since. It is wonderful. But, alas, it is expensive (even at "buy 3 get one FREE!" prices) so I'm trying to find a way to justify it to myself. I suspect I'm not going to be successful in this endeavor.
  2. What exactly are small, unmarked bills? Small = 1s, 5s and 10s, presumably. But the unmarked thing? What does that mean? I mean, I assume that someone marks bills in such a way as to render them trackable, but how? And how do you know if your bills are marked or unmarked? You know Tuesday's post about Twitter? Here again, me being completely clueless.
  3. I so wish I could find a way to motivate myself to do anything physical. I mean, aside from the occasional spontaneous yoga pose performed mid-living room, mid-afternoon in my pajamas because I've been so busy working I've not yet gotten around to getting dressed...
  4. I love Miss Doxie. Today's post (and I say that like she writes every day, which she doesn't, which is tragic) is HILARIOUS. Funniest thing I've read all week. Or in my lifetime. Or, you know, whenever. But it's about one of her dachsunds, so I'm sure ya'll will like it.
  5. I am still, to be completely honest, trying to figure out exactly how many dachshunds Miss Doxie has. Six, at least, I think. It's kind of like Yorkies or Ruffles potato chips: nobody can have just one...
  6. A friend of mine text-messaged me this afternoon asking if I'd like to accompany him in a recital next year. Yay! The problem is, I think he wants me accompany him playing the piano. Which, ok. I've got one and all. And it's a year away. And I know how to play the thing. But, you know... it's scary! He and I are both about similar skill-levels when you compare his cello playing and my flute playing. But when you compare his cello playing with my piano playing? Well, there's just not much to say. He's WAY better. So I'm MUCH more comfortable performing on flute. But I told him I'd definitely consider it because, well... I do so enjoy playing music with others, and a challenge such as this certainly couldn't hurt me. Could it?
  7. When did they add an entirely new, completely up-scale wing to Washington Square??
  8. Do they sell anything other than cheesecake at The Cheesecake Factory? And if so, why exactly? If you've got cheesecake, what else would you need?
  9. I somehow managed to miss three weeks in a row of ER. I've got the Tivo recordings to prove it. Is anyone else completely bored by this season?
  10. And speaking of TV: exactly what are they doing with Audrey Raines on 24? She's catatonic... ok. But she knows stuff! And is anyone at all surprised that Jack managed to lose that circuit board-thingy in his swap for Audrey with the Chinese dude? And why didn't Jack just give Chinese Dude a fake circuit board and skip all the hullabaloo in the first place? (Oh, right. No drama in that!) Sigh. And this season started out so well, too!
  11. I'm getting increasingly frustrated with my feet and legs. Zee to legs: you need to stop being MS-y. Right. Now.
  12. A couple weeks ago, I stumbled upon this website, Moo.com. They sell these little things called Moo Cards. And they are, essentially, calling cards with pictures on one side and whatever-you-want printed on the other. So I ordered me up some to use as a handy way of giving out contact info when I'd prefer not to use my work business cards. They arrived this week and they are FUN! And apparently, there has grown up a whole little ecosystem around them. Who knew?
  13. Despite my rather unsuccessful experience in my last go-round, and my continuing annoyance at Apple's DRM practices, I still want an iPod. NOBODY can tell me that marketing doesn't work. I need to stay far, far away from the mall.

Talk amongst yourselves. I'm going to bed now. :)

Thursday, April 12, 2007

The musical experiment...

I'm rather late to the party with this, but I've been thinking the last couple days about the experiment run in the L'Enfant Metro Station in Washington DC in January. I had seen the article in passing Monday but it wasn't until I read Jen's post about it that I felt compelled to read it all the way through. It's apparently making quite the stir in music circles - classical and otherwise - and it's gotten me thinking about the engima that is classical music in the 21st century.

I actually found the experiment rather interesting, and I read every last word in the article. (This is rare, trust me.) The crux, for those of you not interested in reading the piece, is that this really famous classical violinist (Joshua Bell) camped out in a Metro station in Washington DC to see what kind of reaction commuters would have to him playing there for roughly an hour. The resulting lack of interest was a surprise to many, including Joshua Bell himself.

I've been following Joshua Bell's career since I was young and just getting into classical music. (And he is still as cute as ever!) I heard him play live a couple times when I was in high school and college and he is dynamic to watch and his sound is exquisite.

The article paints him as a bit perturbed, I think, that he didn't get more of a reaction from the public. On the whole, though, I walked away from it thinking, "Wow. Here's a world-class classical musician who not only took time out of his schedule to hang out in a Metro station and play his violin - for an experiment, no less - but he did so gladly and thought it was fun! Good for him." Because how many other musicians of his caliber would have done that?

Exactly zero, is my guess.

Why? Well, I think people see classical music as inaccessible, and the large number of classical musicians (concert performers and otherwise) who act as if they're god's gift to music and superior than "rock" or "pop" (or fill_in_the_style_here) musicians just propagates that problem. I'm not sure about others' perspectives on this, but it seems to me that a lot of concert performers seem to think they are (or should be) above the fray.

Continue reading "The musical experiment..." »

Friday, March 02, 2007

Embracing Mediocrity

I'm feeling a bit blue today. For reasons I cannot explain, having a glass of red wine sounded really, really good. [sigh] And, of course, I started thinking these crazy-ass thoughts on my way home from a meeting. Having trouble figuring that one out. Life in general is pretty good, but it was a tough week at work and I'm not feeling very motivated to go for a run or to do homework or anything else. I'm also feeling very, very judgemental and a bit resentful this evening, so perhaps sitting at home, playing some piano, watching Tivo and blogging is the best place for me.

I have been playing a bit of piano here and there, though, and have decided I'm going to scale back my music goals for the time being. I want to learn some new music, but the pieces I'm drawn to are ungodly difficult. I have no doubt I can learn these pieces (several I've worked on from time to time) but they're each the sort of piece I have to learn painstakingly and often one hand at a time.

So I've decided to put them aside and in the meantime I picked up two books of "easier pieces: Debussy's "Children's Corner" and Schumann's "Kinderszenen" (Scenes from Childhood). The irony of both of these pieces is that they're each filled with several pieces that, while not fiendishly difficult, are still very challenging in one way or another. I think both sets were originally designed as pieces for students to learn some facet of piano playing (an etude, if you will) but each little piece is a gem in its own right - some whimsical, some thoughtful, others humorous.

I heard a concert pianist play the Schumann set once, many years ago, and it was lovely to hear these beautiful little songs played so exquisitely. I can't hope to match that quality, of course, but I think I'm more likely to learn and play these well than I am to even learn the notes for the harder pieces, particularly in the time I have to devote to them.

I think, in so many ways, I want to be the best at everything I try and if I can't be the best I just stop doing whatever it is. With piano, though, quitting isn't really an option. I'm not a fabulous pianist; I'm not even great. Good is pushing it, even. But I love it, and I play because I love it.

Still, I often equate "playing hard pieces" to "being good at piano." And of course, my brain wants me to "be good" because that delivers self worth. Or something approaching self worth. Ego, perhaps. I don't know. I think the point is that I need to redefine my concept of "good at the piano." Perhaps it should involve, at least in part, playing a piece accurately, up to tempo and with some semblance of musicality. Dynamics maybe. (What a concept!)

Anyway, so despite my hopelessly unrealistic need to be "the best" all the time and at everything I do, in this case I need to (continually, ad nauseum) remind myself why I play and what my objectives are in even having a piano: to nourish my soul and reconnect regularly with that part of myself that only music can reach.

If I were entirely truthful, I'd also mention that I often seek approval from others; I want them to think I'm talented or gifted or "cool" or amazing or fill_in_favorable_adjective_here. Given the return on my investment in this case, I think, I need to embrace my mediocrity and forget about whether others are even interested in my musical abilities. Chances are, they couldn't care less.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Sending My Desires to the Universe

It's amazing how posting stuff on the innernets gets people to bring you stuff. I posted that I loved Marshmallow Peeps and yesterday, dad brought some over! How cool!

On the "less than cool" front, I still haven't heard from River. Boo. I don't know what that means, if anything. It might mean he hates me. It also might mean he's been busy. Or got called for a last-minute job. Or that he likes me but not in that "must see you every day!" sort of way. It's really hard to say. So I'm trying not to worry about it. Frankly, I'm not sure exactly how I feel about him either, so I suppose it's useless to speculate.

Maybe, if I could go more than a day in a row without some sort of malady, I'd give him a call and see if we could get together....

Anyway, given the above Amazing Marshmallow Peeps Appearance Phenomenon, I've decided to ask the internet for more things I want. Read on!

Continue reading "Sending My Desires to the Universe" »

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Today's Piano Lesson!

The piano tuner came by yesterday to, well, tune my piano. I'd told him I thought there was something wrong with the center pedal and asked if he could take a look at it.

The center pedal (called the sostenuto pedal), on most grand pianos (and many uprights) is supposed to allow you to have a note or a chord sustain while you go on to play other stuff. Basically, you hit a chord, step on the center pedal and the chord continues to ring. Unlike the sustaining pedal (the one on the far right), which would blur everything together if you were to hold it down while you played, the center pedal doesn't sustain any subsequent notes that are played. (The BBC has a succinct explanation of the three pedals here for those of you who are interested in learning more about this stuff, including the third pedal, the one all the way to the left, called the "una corda" pedal.)

My sostenuto pedal, however, was only working some of the time and for some of the notes. So after he finished tuning the strings, Mr. Piano Tuner Guy pulled my Chickering apart so he could get at the pedal mechanism. I pulled out my camera and took some photos. Click the photo above to take a look at all the piano guts. It's pretty neat!

Turns out the pedal wasn't connected quite right, which is why it wasn't working. (Duh. :) So he reconnected the pedal and now it works for most of the notes. Apparently it needs some more fine tuning, which might need to be done by the shop that sold me the piano. So Mr. Tuner Guy is going to call them and see whether they want to send someone out or if they want him to fix it or what.

The interesting thing about all this is, while he was looking over the instrument and after he'd tuned it, he asked what I'd paid for it. When I told him, he said he'd thought it would have been more than twice what I'd paid!! WOW! He says it's in really good shape and told me he thought the piano had probably been restrung at some point in the 1950s.

Hopefully I'll get the sostenuto pedal issue worked out fairly quickly... Plus, it was nice to see the piano tuner guy - he worked on my Mason & Hamlin way back when, so I've known him for about 5 years or so. He's really a nice guy and does tuning for people all over the city, including a lot of the music schools in the area and the local symphony. He really does an excellent job and my piano sounds wonderful now!! Wohoo!

Thursday, February 08, 2007

A Bit of a Break. Maybe.

So. I'm done with work for the day and ready to get started doing more homework. Only I'm dragging my feet and whining to myself, "But I DON'T WANNNNNNNNNTT TO!" just as I'm playing a few tunes on the Chickering, catching up on blog posts and chasing Rennie around the couch trying to grab her stuffed rabbit.

My life? It's exciting.

Beginning tomorrow, I have five days in a row off. I'd originally planned to take the time off to do homework and get my course project finalized, but I am starting to feel the way I felt right before my last MS relapse: completely and utterly exhausted. So exhausted that watching 24 would make me MORE tired, so Monday's episode is still sitting on the Tivo, waiting for me to turn it on. So exhausted that my ability to think clearly is impaired a bit; I have a rather scary lack of focus, as well. This morning, for example, I poured coffee in my cereal which was disconcerting because it was both disgusting and a waste of perfectly good Stumptown coffee AND Froot Loops.

I tell ya, this multiple sclerosis thing sure is the pits sometimes! I don't think it's that I'm just not getting enough sleep because, after realizing how I've been getting progressively more and more tired over the last few weeks, I have made a concerted effort to get to bed on time and get more sleep. The problem is, this is the kind of fatigue which isn't helped by more sleep. So I'm not sure what to do other than take it easy, get a lot of rest and eat as heathily as possible.

So although tomorrow's plan originally involved spending all day finishing up my final project, it may also involve sleeping in and a nap smack in the middle of the day. The good news, however, is that I did a few calculations and it turns out that I don't have to turn in all of my assignments for the rest of the term to get an A. I have to do most of them, yes, but I can skip one or two and not even drop a grade! This is good news considering I get to the point, sometimes, where thinking is just no longer an option. Sometimes having the luxury of not doing something is a nice ace to have in my back pocket.

So this weekend is that of rest and kicking Mr. MS' rear-end. Speaking of MS, though: I still have not heard from my doctor on the results of my last blood draw. He shall be getting a call from me tomorrow as well!

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

I'm Fine. Really I am.

Just in case ya'll were wondering.

Because I got calls and emails today from a few of you, wondering, "err... are you alright?" and "how are you feeeeling??"

I do appreciate the concern. I do! But I'm fine. I may need to talk to my psychiatrist about upping my meds on account of all the dramatic hyperbole and whatnot, but I'm really just fine.

Except for that little breakdown I had today at the post office. Moments of irony seem to hit me a) when I least expect them and b) right after I've had some happy thought about some facet of my life about which I've composed a brilliant blog post in my head.

Yeah, so on my way to pick up my mail from my post office box I was composing a blog post in my head about how I don't typically write about work-related topics (see: "dooced") but I was making an exception this time because of some brilliant reason (I don't remember what) and by the way did you see Bill Gates on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart?? and blah blah blah and then I opened my post office box and it exploded.

Continue reading "I'm Fine. Really I am." »

Monday, January 29, 2007

Delinquent

I know what you're thinking. I really do.

You think I haven't been writing because I've been spending every darned second not occupied by work, sleeping or cleaning up after Rennie playing my piano.

You're thinking that. I know you are. And you know what?

You would be wrong. Oh yes. So wrong.

So very, very wrong.

Continue reading "Delinquent" »

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Evening Update

So there are a few more photos of the piano/moving experience up on Flickr. This photo of the piano in the context of the larger room is one of my favorites. I like this one an awful lot too:


Reflections


I did a bit of fiddling around with Photoshop on a couple of these pics but most are not retouched. It's been a wacky day, just in general, and I'm exhausted.

For a variety of reasons, most of which involve obsessing about the piano (and a few that involve complete and total avoidance), I'm way behind on some schoolwork. It is sad but true; tomorrow is "homework day" and I'm forbidding myself to play any piano until it's done. Hopefully this weekend I can get ahead some and try and get my reading for the week done early.

Beyond all this, I sent an email to a boy tonight; onus was on me completely because of a variety of factors which I won't go into here, but it's amazing how vulnerable you can feel just sending an email and telling someone, honestly, that you think they're cool. So we shall see what we shall see.

Now, however, I need to get back to focusing on my priorities and try to remember that I'm going to have the piano for a long, long time. No one is coming to take it away tomorrow, so I can put off trying to re-memorize the Brahms Rhapsody or the Bach prelude for a day or so... :)

Happy Thursday, everyone! Thank heavens the week is almost over!

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Chickering Arrives

So there it is, the new piano in my home. Of course, I'll have to put the lid down most of the time to keep the noise down, but doesn't it look nice?? I've already done a bit of playing on it, and it's as nice as I remember.

More pictures of the delivery and assembly forthcoming shortly; I need to blur out the faces of the moving guys since I don't have their permission to put them on the Internet.

I'm off to try and focus on work now, but this evening I've got a couple hours blocked out for practicing and assessing the state of pieces I used to know. I'm afraid a lot of work is going to be needed to get them back up to snuff!

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Me = New Piano Owner!

So as I mentioned Friday, I had planned to do a little piano shopping this weekend. Yesterday, while waiting until I could go pick Rennie up, I went out to the westside store of one of the companies I'd talked to.

I played on most of the instruments in the store and got my fingers back into it a bit. It felt SO GOOD to play, to make music, however poorly. As I'd originally planned to go to the main store today, however, I made plans to meet the salesman guy over there at noon today.

I drove over this morning, and Mr. Piano Salesman was there waiting for me. He took me over to the store's vast and monstrous warehouse/showroom and I must have spent at least an hour - probably more - playing all the instruments within my price range... and a few that weren't. (They had a 9-foot concert grand Steinway which was heaven to play on. That was early in my testing and I amost didn't move on! The $80,000 pricetag was a bit of a deterrent, however!)

Continue reading "Me = New Piano Owner!" »

Friday, January 19, 2007

Piano Shopping

Rememer this post? The one where I whined about fugue states and not having a piano?

Well, the other night I went surfing around the net while taking a break from my PHP homework, looking for companies from whom I could rent a piano. I found a couple of companies in the area (other than Sherman Clay/Moe's) which I subsequently sent email to inquiring about prices and whatnot. I heard from one company immediately; the other, Classic Pianos, I didn't hear from at all, but because I'd heard good things about them I gave them a call this afternoon.

I talked to the guy for quite a while and based on my conversation with him, it's starting to sound like purchasing a piano might be a better move for me than renting. For one thing, I'll end up paying only slightly more per month by buying the instrument, but I'll get a better piano that way. For another, they have a lifetime upgrade policy, which allows you to trade in your piano for the full price you paid for it towards the purchase of a better instrument.

So I'm in a bit of a quandry. I have an appointment and then pick up Rennie tomorrow so I'm thinking I may head over there Sunday afternoon to play a few instruments and see what they've got. I've got no reason to rush other than that I'd love to have the thing sooner rather than later.

But first things first: I need to see how much this business with Rennie is going to set me back. Thank goodness for savings accounts!! I just wish I had more in mine!

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Fugue State

The rather squishy concept of the "fugue state," which is medically described as "an altered state of consciousness in which a person may move about purposely and even speak but is not fully aware" has been popping up with alarming frequency over the last few weeks.

The first time I heard the term was on Christmas eve, when I was visiting with my friend and he made mention of having been in one during the previous year. Having never heard the term before, I asked what it meant, and he described it as, "that feeling where you suddenly don't remember what you were just doing, or where you feel like you're not sure what you've just spent the last couple days or weeks doing." (Sounds sort of like an alcoholic blackout, now I think about it, but I digress...)

Anyway, so we discussed it briefly and moved on and I didn't give it another thought until this afternoon while reading a post on Wil Wheaton's blog. He too described having awoken one morning in such a funk and, determined to get to the bottom of what this thing was, I went on a web hunt.

Continue reading "Fugue State" »

Monday, December 25, 2006

Dead Ringers

So last night I went to visit with a dear friend I've known for many years, since we were both free for the evening of familial and holiday commitments. We made an easy dinner and then spent the rest of our visit chatting and drinking tea and eating Godiva chocolates. At one point he pulled out his laptop to show me this YouTube video of Los Beats, an Argentinian Beatles cover band. Apparently these guys are "the best" Beatles cover band around and the interesting thing is that they're Argentinian. (Now that I look more closely at this video, though, I'm thinking they may not be playing live - cuz, you know, no cords going to the guitars - but it's still pretty fun to watch. Plus, if it's not a track of the actual Beatles recording, it's an amazing cover!!)

My friend also introduced me to comedian Frank Caliendo. If you want to laugh until your sides hurt, check out this video of him doing his President Bush impersonations on Dave Letterman:

Hilarious!

And I seem to have found the attraction of YouTube (which, admittedly, has eluded me up until now) because I found this video of The Beatles themselves playing "I Saw Her Standing There" live to be a pretty amazing testament to why Beatlemania took hold of the country.

Merry Christmas everyone!! I'm off to look for some live Doors/Jim Morrison videos and then to grandma's for Christmas dinner! :)

Monday, December 18, 2006

Classes are over! + "Weird Al" Yankovic

Classes are officially over now. Well, technically we were done on Saturday but I finally got my grades this evening. And - hooray! - I got an A in both classes! Next term is "Introduction to Programming" and "Database Systems." I'm going to be learning about PHP scripting and database design. WOO! Actually, I'm pretty excited about these things, which makes me wonder if - perhaps - I should have gone the "programmer" router rather than the Website designer one.

But the term is over and I have a few weeks to relax and rest my brain. And also to get through that CSS tome I've been meaning to get to. Beginning Wednesday I have 7 days in a row off so it will be nice to get some real relaxing (read: sitting on my ass watching Tivo) in as well as updating my website.

My hope is that I'll have my new site identity and design in place by the turn of the year. There. I've said it. Now I'm committed! ;-)

Anyway... other than all that, well... not really sure what more there is to say. I'm feeling pretty good these days and am starting to get back into living my life again. I've started doing yoga before going to bed and that seems to help with both my energy levels and the little nagging aches and pains I've been getting. The sensory issues seem to come and go, but for the most part they are no longer keeping me from doing what I want to do. The areas of weirdness are there constantly, I mean, but they're not causing me much concern at this point.

But most importantly, aside from the occasional bruise, the Avonex isn't causing me any trouble anymore. I seem to be able to give myself my shot whenever with minimal trouble or side effects. THANK HEAVENS. This is the treatment I really wanted to be on and I'm so glad we've finally gotten me to the point where it's not making my life miserable. So unless my neurologist has a real problem with it (unlikely) when I see him on the 2nd of January, I'll be starting back at work full time again after the first of the year.

So things are good. Just got home from dinner w/ my dad and brother and his family. All is well. I'm feeling content, even if everything in my life isn't as I'd have it. I'm just fine and that's enough.

But, for those of you who want more: follow the extended entry, there is a link to a funny video plus a blast from the past!

Continue reading "Classes are over! + "Weird Al" Yankovic" »

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

The Folksinger

A couple weeks ago, my dad came by to bring me some mail that had gone to his place, and - as we often do - we headed to our favorite Chinese restaurant up the street from my apartment. In addition to the mail, he brought with him the final copy of his newest album, The Folksinger and we spent quite a lot of time at dinner talking about the CD and his favorite songs on it and how things turned out.

Nearly two years ago, I wrote this post, talking about growing up listening to my dad and his friend Tim playing songs and the way that music shaped my life and love of music. And just as the music produced by my dad's surfabilly bands and his duo with Tim had an impact, so too did all the solo music my dad wrote.

I've loved all the albums my dad has produced so far and the first three all contained a number of songs I remember listening to him play as a kid. But this newest album, this one is different. Like the others, there are a few newly-written songs mixed with "old favorites." But this album includes the ones I really remember from my childhood, the ones I still sing to myself on occasion, because the words and melodies spring up out of nowhere at times both appropriate and not. These words from Scrambled Egg Massacre, for instance, spring into my head in the kitchen, especially when a bit of extra smoke sends Rennie running into the other room:

And it's, "Good grief, holy smoke!
What's that awful smell?"
It's just me, cooking eggs again.
I can't cook too well.

The ones I remember most of the words to are, like "Scrambled Egg Massacre," the humorous ones, because dad used to sing these on request of visiting family and friends: "The Great Mt. Hood Skiing Disaster," "Life Insurance Blues," and one that didn't make it onto this album, "Made in Japan." I happen to know these aren't my dad's favorites - I assume for just this reason - but I get a kick out of them both because they invoke some nostalgia and also because they're just funny.

My favorites on this album, though, are a bit less "catchy" but infinitely more interesting. They are: How the West Was Missed, The Ballad of J.T. Baker and The Good Samaritan (this one has really beautiful music - 12 string guitar, I believe - in addition to the lyrics.)

Back in the Good Ol' Days: Years ago, before I was born and also when I was really little, my dad drove cab. One day he picked up fare, an older man, from Union Station in downtown Portland. As dad was driving him to wherever he was going, the old guy talked about living in Portland and growing up and - as my dad puts it - the song practically wrote itself.

I've always loved this song and the version on this cd has everything in it I remember hearing from when my dad first recorded it back in the 80s. Except, now my dad's a few years older and his voice is a bit deeper and, when I listen to this song now, it's as if I can hear that old man talking. For that reason, I think it's my favorite song on this album.

For those of you who are interested, the new CD is available for purchase here. You can also listen to some samples of the songs here too. And, although they're not up there yet, the songs from this album will also eventually be available from iTunes. More info here.

(Oh, and just because I know my dad will ask :), my favorite "new" song on the album is "Concrete and Steel." The other new ones include "Big Cow" and "I Don't Want to Talk to a Machine," and they are both good. But I like Concrete and Steel because ... welll.... I'm not sure why. The chord progression is interesting, the lyrics are clever and, well... it's just good.)

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Rocky Mountain High

You know Rocky Mountain High, that great John Denver song??

It's one of the few songs in the whole wide world that makes me want to learn to play the guitar. Wicked-cool guitar part in a wicked-cool song. (And yes, I am feeling wicked-nostalgic for New England... )

As most who know me well can attest, I am not talented at playing stringed-instruments (unless you count the piano which, as everyone knows, isn't really considered a stringed instrument) and despite trying multiple times, I just cannot seem to make stringed instruments work well. Or, at all. I've tried guitar, electric bass, violin and cello and they all sounded just awful, regardless of how much I practiced. I was most successful at the bass but even that was rather pathetic.

Anyway, there aren't very many songs that make me wish I could play the guitar, but Rocky Mountain High is definitely one of them.

Friday, September 08, 2006

Weepy

For reasons I cannot begin to explain, I am uncharacteristically weepy tonight. It all started when I was watching this John Denver retrospective/documentary on PBS (for those of you in Portland, it repeats tonight and Sunday!) and I got all choked up at all the sentimental songs - particularly "Sunshine on My Shoulders." I know this probably isn't "cool" among my generation, but I have to admit - I heart John Denver. (Btw, there's a great scene in this documentary where John Denver sings "Take Me Home, Country Roads" with Johnny Cash. Johnny's in his characteristic black; John's wearing a flowered-70s shirt. So. COOL.)

Anyway, so I got all choked up during that special and then watched "What a Girl Wants" (for the Colin Firth factor! YUM!) and found myself getting all weepy at that, too. (It's a cute movie - definitely worth watching on cable.)

And then I logged onto the web to read some blogs and learned that one of the MS-bloggers I've been reading about is having ongoing trouble w/ her disease and, likely, it is worsening. She's going on Novantrone for a little while to see if they can get the symptoms under control. (Sending prayers and good thoughts her way!) But this got me a bit choked up too. I'm still in the early stages of my disease but, right now, the symptoms are not going away as quickly as I would like and I'm looking at changing things in my life a rather drastic way for a while. It's all so disheartening!

I think the thing that is most remarkable about all this weeping is that, for the last 10 months or so (since I stopped drinking) my heart has felt generally numb. I think I've cried - I mean really cried - maybe twice in the last 10 months. So to get all weepy over these little things seems strange and weird. Anyway, on some levels I think what I need is a good cry and perhaps what all this means is that I'm finally recapturing some of my emotions?

Hard to say.

What I do know is that I need to a) focus on the positive things in my life; those things that bring me joy and put a smile on my face; and b) stop listening to sappy John Denver songs!

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Clouds in My Coffee?

I was just listening to Carly Simon's "You're So Vain." For the first time, I think ever, I really listened to the words and I'm hoping someone can please explain this line, because I am at a total loss:

I had some dreams they were clouds in my coffee, clouds in my coffee and....

Clouds in my coffee? Clouds? IN COFFEE? Clouds of WHAT? Who is the "they" that she's referring to? And what in hell does coffee have to do with anything in this song?

Art. Bah.

Friday, January 13, 2006

More updates

Well, so I've updated the blog again - this time with a 'quick and dirty' banner. The reason? I finally came up with a tagline for this site: "where weird is the status quo," which I came up with yesterday while talking to a friend of mine. Seems appropriate for this stage of my life...! There are still a few tweaks to make to the blog to clean it up a bit (like the alignment of the top of the two sidebars) but I'm ok with how it looks for now.

Also, thanks to Ms. Betsy, I've just discovered and signed up for last.fm, which creates a list of the music you're listening to on your PC and allows you to create radio stations, look at what other people are listening, find others who have similar musical tastes, and share recommendations with friends. It also gives these nifty charts that indicate which songs, albums and artists are your favorites. Kinda nifty!

Check out my soundtrack by clicking here. So far this is pretty cool, so perhaps I'll add it to my blog.... we shall see. :)

Monday, January 09, 2006

Chopin

Wow. Well, it happened (is happening) again. My soul is in the midst of being nourished by Chopin's Barcarolle (Opus 60), played by Claudio Arrau. This is not even my favorite of Chopin's piano pieces, but it speaks to the genius and brilliance of this music that it can provide me with some measure of comfort and peace just from one listening.

Back in college, I listened to nothing but classical music and lately I've gotten away from listening to this music on a regular basis. I'm not sure why, though it may have something to do with the burnout I experienced after the four years I devoted almost entirely to it. But I've never lost my love for it and to this day I still have such an emotional connection to the music of Bach, Beethoven, Mozart, Brahms and Chopin, to name just a few.

I want to get back to listening to this music again - perhaps even go to a few live concerts? So to that end, I've added a goal for 2006:

1. Stay sober.
2. Find a permanent job.
3. Stop using credit altogether. If don't have the cash for it, I don't buy it. Period. School is the only exception here, but otherwise, no charging.
4. Get my diet back under control.
5. Go to at least one ballet class per week.
6. Earn one "leg" towards Rennie's Companion Dog title.
7. Redesign my blog.
8. Reacquaint myself with the classical music world: listen to classical music at least three times each week and go to at least one live classical performance each quarter.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

It's Available ... [subliminal message] So Go Buy It [/subliminal message]

Remember when I mentioned a couple weeks ago that my dad had finished his latest album? Well, it's now available on CDBaby.com for listening and buying. It's an interesting mix of old and new songs, including two covers: "Blowin' in the Wind" by Bob Dylan and "The Folk Code" by Tim Otto, my dad's friend whom I've known for most of my life. The other ten songs are all written by my dad and contain some really great stuff.

I've been listening to it for a couple weeks now and I think my favorite song on the album is "The Letter," which is a song that talks about going home after having been away for a long time. Dad brought an early copy of the album with him when he visited me in Boston in July and we listened to it during one of our drives to somewhere and I ended up having to skip the song halfway through because it choked me up. It's amazing how music does that sometimes - just goes straight to the heart of the emotion you're feeling, punching you right in the stomach.

I have a tendency to favor the 'older' songs my dad includes on his albums: I grew up listening to these songs and they are familiar and comforting. "The Letter" falls into that category, as does "Mistakes," "Sunday's Song," "All Night Long," "That Woman Had a Hold On Me" and "Everybody's Complaining." There are fewer 'new' songs on this album than his previous two but the four it does have are all solid. "You Win Again" is my favorite of those. Good writing, interesting harmonies and instrumental writing.

Good stuff.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

It Always Comes Back to Music

One of my dearest friends is the conductor and music director of several community orchestras in this area. We met seven or eight years ago when I was in college. He was conducting my college's orchestra and I was playing in the flute section. I was nearly finished with my degree at that point - just finishing up a few classes and working for Portland's local newspaper on the side - and was rarely at school. So I'm not exactly sure how we became friends... there was the occasional bit of amusing banter thrown around during rehearsals, but rarely was there any meaningful conversation before or after class.

I think we really started becoming friends after I'd graduated, when I began working full-time for the paper and started getting my morning coffee at about the same time and place he did. So we did the chit-chat-in-line thing for a long while; then one day we exchanged email addresses; a while later we had lunch. And we've been fast friends ever since.

Continue reading "It Always Comes Back to Music" »

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Whatever Happened To...

The GoGos?

I downloaded some music from iTunes today, and was just listening to a couple of the songs from the GoGos albums I owned on LP back in 5th grade.

I didn't appreciate it fully at the time - and what can you expect from a 10-year-old, really? - but listening to it now? This girl band ROCKED. I mean, listen to "We Got the Beat." That drum solo in the beginning? Damn friggin' cool. I just might have to fabricate a crush on their drummer, Gina Schock.

A quick Google search reveals that The GoGos are still around, actually. They recently released an album called "God Bless the GoGos." Might have to give that a listen.

But meanwhile, I shall be grooving to my freshly downloaded Talking Heads, Mr. Mister, Pet Shop Boys, Duran Duran, The Bangles, as well as some tunes by The Byrds, The Eagles and Neil Young thrown in for good measure.

I'm a child of the 80s. Yes, oh yes, I am.

Monday, June 13, 2005

I'm Driving a Hyundai

Remember that little accident I was in, lo these many months ago?? Well, this morning I FINALLY took my car into the body shop to have it repaired. Jason, the owner of the shop where I took the car, was kind and pleasant and has been a dream to deal with so far. Really, he's just making my life SO easy where this is concerned. Because really, the reason it's taken me so damn long to get my car fixed at all has to do with the fact that I hate to be inconvenienced.

I love it when I find somewhere that provides such stellar service. Sadly, this is not something that companies seem to offer these days, and particularly not in the Boston area.

So now I'm the proud renter of a stupid little white car that doesn't have a CD player, power windows or power door locks but DOES have air conditioning. Thank goodness. It is miserable and thick outside and I can barely think. But in just 5 days I'll have my car back and it will be dentless and clean and pretty and good as new.

And in other news...

Continue reading "I'm Driving a Hyundai" »

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Five Music Questions

Parker has thrown down the gauntlet and I'm powerless to resist. After all, they're MUSIC questions!!

Total volume of music on my computer:
At work, 4.3GB. At home I have 2.66 GB. Seems odd that I have more at work, but they're all MP3 files, while the stuff at home is largely in WMA format which, as I understand it, makes smaller files. I know I have more music at home than I do at work. It's just taking up less space.

Last CD I bought:
I think it was Ray Charles: Ultimate Hits Collection, which I bought back in February.

Honestly, I can't believe it's been 3 months since I bought a CD! In college I think I averaged at least one disc a day. Maybe I'm finally cured?

Favorite song from that album:
Ohh, they're all good, but I think my favorites are:
"Hit the Road, Jack"
"I Got A Woman"
"What'd I Say"
"Unchain My Heart"

Song playing now:
Tim Otto & Chris Charles: Heroes of the West

This is the title track of the disc my dad and his friend Tim recently released. Some really good stuff here.

Songs I listen to a lot or that mean a lot:
Oh good grief, where to begin? Lesseee....
Come Away With Me, Norah Jones
Here Comes the Sun, the Beatles
Crystal Ship, the Doors
Maybe You're Right, Cat Stevens
Red Cloud, Chris Charles
Desperado, The Eagles
Come Undone, Duran Duran
Goin' Against the Grain, Tim Otto & Chris Charles
Easy From Now On, Emmylou Harris
Goldberg Variations, Johann Sebastian Bach (sorry, had to throw in something classical!)

Um... yeah. Looks like I have pretty eclectic taste in music. There are more, but it'd be a really long post if I were to list them all!

Five people I nominate to do fill out this survey?:
Umm... how about anyone who has an inkling?? Just let me know, and I'll post the links here. :)

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Time & Music

Now that I'm settled in my new home, I'm discovering a number of things. The most important, to me, is something that I never thought applied to me until moving in with roommates last fall.

My dad told me a while back that he finds himself to be significantly more creative when he's living by himself. He writes more songs, is more motivated to work on them, enjoys it more. And, oddly enough, I'm finding myself to be similarly wired.

While living in my last home, I was lucky to be able to sit down at the piano once during the weekend. But since moving, I've played the piano - and sometimes the flute also - almost every single day. Each 'session' may not be for a substantial period of time (and by that I mean for 45 minutes or more), but it is me and the keyboard and Brahms or Bach or Debussy.

Yesterday, in pursuit of one of my goals for 2005, I spent some time working on the Brahms Rhapsody I've been learning for-bloody-ever. I worked through some sections that had gotten sloppy over the last few months and I was pleasantly surprised to discover that my level of memorization of the piece hadn't atrophied too substantially.

Anyway, I'm enjoying the fact that I can play anytime I want and not have to worry at all about what the roommates might be doing. I have discovered that my upstairs neighbors also have a piano that is practiced with some regularity, so I'm hoping their tolerance level is going to be fairly high, so long as I'm not playing at some ungodly hour like 3 a.m.

Continue reading "Time & Music" »

Monday, June 06, 2005

Music Humor

So, three notes walk into a bar -- a G, an Eb, and a C. The bartender looks up and says "We don't serve minors."

So the Eb leaves and the other two have a fifth between them. After a few drinks, the G was out flat, and the experience was diminished.

Eventually, the C sobers up, sees one of his friends missing, the other one passed out, and realizes to his horror that he's under a rest. C was brought to trial, found guilty and convicted of contributing to the diminution of a minor and was sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at the Paul Williams/Neil Sedaka Correctional Facility.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

Tidbits

Some random things to report:

CD Release Party
I mentioned in passing last week that my dad and his friend Tim had decided to release the series of recordings they'd made back in 1983 as a new album titled "Heroes of the West." Dad had sent this disc to me by special request a couple months back, and it is his opinion that this album is the best stuff he and Tim have ever done as a duo or part of a group. So they've decided to officially release it and as part of that, they're having a CD Release party this Friday, May 20.

For those of you in Portland, if you're interested in stopping by to give a listen, here are the details:
Date/Time: Friday, May 20, 9:00 p.m.
Location: Owen's Place, 3975 S.W. Mercantile Drive, Lake Oswego.

Apparently it's a very nice little place and primarily a restaurant, so it will be all-ages. They serve beer and wine, snacks & sandwiches.

This is the worst part of living 3000 miles away. You don't get to support - in person - the things your family and friends are doing. Oh well...

If you go, drop by and leave a comment here and let me know how it was!!

Continue reading "Tidbits" »

Monday, April 25, 2005

Bitter Winds

There was an interesting story in yesterday's Oregonian, Portland's local newspaper, about the dismissal of principal flutist Dawn Weiss by the Oregon Symphony's new music director/conductor. As the story points out, Weiss has been around for ages, and it wasn't until the new music director, Carlos Kalmar, took over that she was singled out as needing improvement.

The thing about the Oregon Symphony - and particularly the Oregon Symphony under previous conductor James DePriest - is that they regularly had intonation issues. Their playing was uninspired. Their programming was boring. I stopped going regularly to OSO concerts shortly after graduating from college because I found the ticket prices too high for the quality of playing and the dull programming they presented. Apparently, Kalmar agreed and has already begun making a huge difference in both technical areas and in programming.

So I find this latest chain of events interesting. Years ago, at my previous company, I was given a similar command: shape up or we're shipping you out. And I did. And while I can talk freely about it now, almost 5 years later, at the time it was the most humiliating, disappointing event of my career. I did everything I could to improve. And, similarly, it sounds as if Weiss tried to do the same. But it seems she wasn't as successful as she needed to be, and her contract was not renewed.

This is regrettable, but at the same time, any employer who is not happy with an employee's performance is free to request improvement and, eventually, dismiss them if needed. That's why we all sign employment agreements that state that we're working 'at will,' right?? (Not so with unions, perhaps...)

Continue reading "Bitter Winds" »

Friday, April 01, 2005

Goin' Against the Grain

Years and years and years ago (like, more than 20!) my dad and his friend Tim used to get together on a regular basis and play music at our house. For a while, they'd set up in the dining room and play for hours, and later dad set up the basement and nailed egg cartons all over the ceiling and walls to absorb the sound and they played down there. Tim and dad did this for years, with various and sundry other musicians joining them at times. As you might expect, by the time the bands broke up and Tim had moved away and dad had stopped playing for the most part, I knew the words to every one of the songs, whether I liked them or not.

Most of them I did like, in fact, and for years afterwards I'd occasionally hear a song in my head and be reminded of those jam sessions. A year or so ago, dad loaned me a tape he and Tim had made back in 1983, and I was excited to find that some of my favorite Tim & Dad songs were on that tape! These were songs that had haunted my memories, that I couldn't quite place or recall, but little snippets would surface now and again.

Unfortunately, these songs were only on tape and I had long since switched all my music over to digital format. As I've written about before, most of what my dad and Tim or their band from that same era, the Surf Cowboys, have done is on CD by now. This tape was the last holdout.

Continue reading "Goin' Against the Grain" »

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Music is Dangerous

If yesterday was the day when I felt like crying, today was the day I made good on that promise. And believe it or not, work wasn't even the cause of the emotional meltdown. Of all things, a Norah Jones song had me feeling nostalgic and wondering whether I did the right thing several years ago when I broke up with B. Upon reflection, I realize:


  • Breaking off the relationship was the right thing for me to do at the time. I wasn't getting what I needed from him - he even admitted (and apologized for) this later - and I certainly wasn't going to find what I wanted and needed by sticking around.
  • I still really care for him, and I don't think that will ever go away. And I don't want it to go away.
  • Even if we promised to try to meet each other half way in terms of our needs, how quickly would we slide back into the same relationship we had 4 years ago?

And of course, the Norah Jones song had me thinking about the relationship as a whole and wondering whether trying a relationship with B. again would be a good idea, if we could pinpoint up front where the breakdowns were the last time 'round. The thing is, so many things in that relationship did work - it was just the critical emotional stuff I wasn't willing to do without.

In general, is going back to a relationship that didn't work the first time ever a good thing to do? Can people change the way they relate to others? In my experience, changing the very fundamentals of one's character is nearly impossible.

The bottom line is, as my friend Sandi reminded me this evening, if it's meant to be it will happen. And in the meantime, I had myself a good cathartic sob-fest, which always feels good (afterwards.)

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